people without passwords on their phones are the strongest and most terrifying people you will ever meet
i have childhood memories that i am not 100% sure actually happened or if i dreamed them i really do not know
Fun shark attack facts:
- In 1996, toilets injured 43,000 Americans a year. Sharks injured 13.
- In 1996, 2,600 Americans were injured by room fresheners. Sharks injured 13.
- In 1996, buckets and pails injured almost 11,000 Americans. Sharks injured 13.
- For every human killed by a shark, humans kill approximately two million sharks.
- Humans are assholes.
- Sharks are not assholes.
- Apparently everyone in 1996 lived in a real-life infomercial.
whats the difference between outlaws and inlaws
outlaws are wanted
come on reblog this my grandma told me this joke and was convinced she was going to be famous on tumblr for it
every time my mom and grandma get into an argument my grandma says “excuse me pamela i am famous on the tumbler”
treat me like a college textbook. spend lots of money on me but never touch or look at me
no. treat me like your favorite book. keep me by your side, touch my every page, learn all my twists and turns, remember every word I say, even the ones that make you cry
*4-second-long fart noise*